You have found someone online. The conversation is going smoothly, the photos are authentic, and you’re prepared to meet. But how will you be sure that the person appearing is indeed the one he or she claims to be?
Online dating has revolutionized the way people meet, but it has also introduced new dangers. A profile that appears completely normal is the beginning of catfishing and financial scams, and even dangerous encounters. A background check on a person’s dating history provides you a method to verify the fundamentals before you meet them in person.
This guide will explain what a dating background check entails, how you can conduct one yourself, and when it’s appropriate to hire a professional service.
What Is a Dating Background Check?
A dating background check is the process of verifying a person’s identity and basic history prior to meeting them face-to-face. It’s not a matter of sifting through someone’s whole life. It’s about verifying that the person you are talking to is a real person and there is no reason to have a serious concern about them in their public record.
Most of those who do this are not trying to trick someone into telling a lie. They only want to be sure the name, age and pictures are accurate.
How a Dating Background Check Works
The basic check begins with the information that the person has already provided: name, age, job, and location. Then, you cross-check that data with public records and online activity.
You can do this two ways. The first is manual – searching names, reverse-searching photos, and checking social media yourself. The second is by using a background check service that accesses criminal records, court documents and public records in mere minutes rather than hours.
Both methods do not need any special access or hacking skills. All the material used is legal and based on information available to the public.
What Information Can You Verify?
A normal dating background check can verify:
- Full legal name and known aliases
- Age and date of birth
- Current and past addresses
- Marital status, if publicly recorded
- Criminal history, including arrests and convictions
- Sex offender registry status
- Employment claims, where verifiable
- Social media presence and activity history
Not all of it will always be found in all searches. A common name will be more difficult to identify than a distinctive name. It’s normal and that’s why a background check is best used in conjunction with your observations, rather than in place of them.
Why Conduct a Background Check Before a Date?
Most people don’t think twice about taking a first date with an unknown person. However, a quick check beforehand can save you from wasted time, awkward situations or worse.
Identifying Potential Red Flags
A background check can reveal information that a profile won’t tell you. When a person says they are divorced but there is a record of an active marriage, it is important to know. When someone says they are from one city, but their address history is from another, it’s worth asking.
Not all of these are “must haves. Life is complex, and sometimes records don’t tell the whole story. Knowing in advance means you have the opportunity to ask the questions, rather than learning the hard way.
Protecting Yourself From Dating Scams
The Federal Trade Commission reports that Americans lose over $1.14 billion each year to romance scams. Typically, the pattern is that a profile establishes trust over a period of weeks, and then requests funds for an emergency, plane ticket, or business opportunity.
A background check may not always reveal a scammer, particularly when they’re operating under a fake name. However, if the name, pictures and story don’t correspond to any public record, then it’s a red flag to take it easy. People have a digital footprint, and it is typically left by real people. Scammers often don’t.
How to Conduct an Online Dating Background Check
No special tools are required to get started. It takes about 15-20 minutes to do a manual check and most of the basics are covered.
Reviewing Dating Profiles and Social Media
Begin with the public information. Consider how long their social media has been around. If you see a Facebook or Instagram profile that was made two months ago, and has very few friends and no tagged photos, it is a sign of a fake account.
Compare their job, school, and city on all platforms they have said. Real people have similar information on LinkedIn, Instagram and Facebook. Scammers tend to have one or two accounts and the information is not always consistent.
Verifying Someone’s Identity and Public Information
One of the quickest checks you can perform is a reverse image search. Save their profile picture and search on Google Images or TinEye. When the same photo appears in another name, on a stock photo website or associated with another person’s social media, you have the solution.
Their full name can also be searched with their city or employer. The public records site, local news archives and court record databases can verify if the person is who they say they are.
Recognising Inconsistencies in Dating Profiles
Pay attention to small details that don’t add up. A doctor who cannot answer simple questions about his/her job. A person whose age does not correspond to the one indicated by his or her biography or pictures. A person who refuses to have any video or phone calls, always with a new excuse.
A single inconsistency isn’t proof of anything. They are arranged in a pattern.
What to Look for During a Safe Dating Background Check
The check is just half the work. It is just as important to know what constitutes a real warning sign.
Common Warning Signs in Online Dating
- Profile photos that look professionally shot or model-like, with no casual pictures
- A new account with little activity history
- Refusal to video chat or meet in a public place
- Moving the conversation off the dating app very quickly
- Asking for money, gift cards, or financial information before meeting
- Vague or inconsistent answers about their job, location, or past
- A love interest that develops unusually fast
How to Identify Suspicious Behaviour
Believe the pattern, not one moment. It’s not suspicious if someone is nervous on a first message. A person who continually fails to check simple information about themselves is.
Don’t feel pressured to avoid public meeting places, and if they try to talk you out of telling your friends where you’re going, it’s a big warning sign. True interest is not a pressure to isolate you from people that know you.
Is a Dating Background Check Enough to Ensure Your Safety?
A background check reduces your risk. It doesn’t delete it.
Public records are incomplete. A clean record does not mean that someone is safe, and a record from a long time ago does not mean that someone is not. A background check doesn’t reveal what someone is like today, it reveals what they were like in the past.
This is why it’s best used as part of a larger safety plan. Add in going on the first date to a public place, letting a friend know where you are going, booking your own car, and listening to your instincts if something doesn’t feel right during the date. All of these steps are not difficult and together fill in the blanks that a background check cannot.
When Should You Consider Professional Background Checking Services?
Manual search is basic, but limited. TruthFinder, BeenVerified, and Social Catfish search databases of criminals, court records, and sex offenders, which are not available on Google.
Think about having a professional check when:
- You’re planning to meet someone you’ve only spoken to online
- The relationship is moving toward something serious
- You’ve noticed inconsistencies you can’t resolve on your own
- The person has asked for money or financial details
- You simply want more certainty before investing more time
The cost of these services are typically $20 to $40 per report or $25 to $35 per month for continuous access. It’s a minor expense for the time, money or safety risk of meeting someone who’s not who they say they are.
Frequently Asked Questions
Don’t take the chance of meeting a stranger online. Checking the list for a few minutes and some simple precautions on the day will make your odds very good.